Quick guide
Reading tarot for LGBTQ+ clients does not need a special deck or a special method. It needs a reader who treats the gendered figures on the cards as roles and moods rather than as statements about who is sitting at the table. The Kings, Queens, Knights and Pages of the Rider-Waite-Smith deck, and couple cards like the Lovers and the Two of Cups, describe ways of acting and relating; they do not describe a client’s gender, orientation or relationship shape. The practical work is in the questions a reader asks, the words they choose, and the care they take with privacy, since not every client is out and not every reading happens in a safe room. Tarot cannot tell anyone who they are, who they should love, or whether a partner is faithful; it offers prompts for reflection, and that is enough.
Most tarot decks in use today copy the Rider-Waite-Smith deck of 1909, and that deck comes with assumptions baked into its pictures: sixteen court cards split into masculine and feminine titles, a Lovers card showing a man and a woman, an Empress and an Emperor, a Ten of Cups with a couple and two children. None of that was designed with a modern, varied clientele in mind. A reader who takes those images literally will keep bumping into clients the pictures do not fit. A reader who understands what the images are for, which is to show roles, situations and feelings, will find the same cards work for anyone. This guide covers how to read the gendered cards without assuming anything, what inclusive decks offer and where they fall short, which questions help and which hurt, and the safety and privacy issues that matter more for LGBTQ+ clients than many readers realise.
Why the court cards are gendered in the first place
Tarot began as a card game in northern Italy in the 1430s, and its court cards simply copied the royal households of the period: a king, a queen, a mounted knight and a page or servant for each suit. When the deck was later reworked for divination, those figures were kept and given personality traits. The Golden Dawn system of the late 1800s, which Arthur Waite and Pamela Colman Smith drew on, treated each court card as a blend of element and rank: the Queen of Cups as water of water, the Knight of Swords as fire of air, and so on. The gender of the figure was a convention of the rank, not a claim about who the card points to.
That history matters because it shows the gendering is a leftover, not a rule. Even within the tradition, the Thoth deck, painted in the late 1930s and early 1940s, renamed the Kings as Knights and the Pages as Princesses, and many modern decks have changed the titles again. The ranks carry the meaning; the costumes are decoration.
Reading court cards as roles, not people
A simple way to keep court cards neutral is to read each rank as an approach to the suit’s territory rather than as a person of a particular gender.
Pages are beginners and messengers: someone learning, noticing, starting out. Knights are movement: pursuing, chasing, sometimes rushing. Queens are mastery turned inward: holding, nurturing, understanding the suit from the inside. Kings are mastery turned outward: directing, deciding, taking responsibility for others. Any client, of any gender, can be in a Page mood on Monday and a King mood on Friday.
When a court card does seem to point to another person in the client’s life, describe the approach rather than the figure. “Someone who leads with warmth and gets things done” is a Queen of Wands reading that fits a partner, a boss, a sibling or a friend of any gender. “A woman with red hair” is a parlour trick that will be wrong more often than right and will alienate anyone whose life does not match the card’s picture.
The Lovers and other couple cards
The Lovers in the Rider-Waite-Smith deck shows two naked figures under an angel, with a tree of fruit behind one and a tree of flames behind the other. Readers have long treated the card as being about choice, union, values and the meeting of opposites. Nothing in that reading depends on the figures being a man and a woman. For a client in a same-sex relationship, a polyamorous arrangement, or no relationship at all, the Lovers is still about a meaningful choice and what the client is committing to.
The same goes for the Two of Cups (two people exchanging cups: mutual regard, partnership of any kind), the Ten of Cups (a family scene: belonging and home as the client defines them), the Ten of Pentacles (three generations: legacy, chosen family, long-term security) and the Empress and Emperor (nurture and structure, not mother and father). A chosen family is as much a Ten of Cups as any other family, and a reader who says so without being asked makes the reading easier for the client.
Common cards with gender-neutral readings
| Card | What the picture shows | A neutral reading |
|---|---|---|
| King of Wands | A crowned figure holding a sprouting staff | Taking the lead with energy and vision; owning a project or decision |
| Queen of Swords | A seated figure with a raised sword and an outstretched hand | Clear thinking after hard experience; honesty without cruelty; healthy boundaries |
| Knight of Cups | A rider carrying a cup at walking pace | An offer, an invitation or a romantic gesture; following feeling into action |
| Page of Pentacles | A young figure studying a coin | Learning a practical skill; a small, solid start |
| The Empress | A crowned figure in a field of grain | Nurture, abundance, creative output, caring for a body or a project |
| The Emperor | An armoured figure on a stone throne | Structure, rules, authority; building something that lasts |
| The Lovers | Two figures beneath an angel | A value-based choice; a union of any kind; what you are saying yes to |
| Two of Cups | Two figures exchanging cups | Mutual regard and partnership, romantic or not |
| Ten of Cups | A rainbow over a family and a house | Belonging, home and emotional security as the client defines them |
| The High Priestess | A seated figure between two pillars | Privacy, inner knowledge, what is not yet ready to be said |
Inclusive decks: what they are and what they are not
Over the past decade “inclusive tarot” has become a recognisable genre. Some decks keep the Rider-Waite-Smith scenes and redraw the people with a range of bodies, ages, skin tones and couples. Others rename the court cards entirely, replacing King, Queen, Knight and Page with rank titles that carry no gender at all. A few redesign the Lovers to show more than two figures or figures whose gender is not specified.
These decks are useful for two reasons. They make it easier for a client to see themselves in the cards without the reader having to translate, and they signal, before a word is said, that the reader has thought about who might sit across the table. Their limits are worth knowing too. A deck that changes the images may not match the guidebook meanings a client has learned elsewhere, so it helps to say a sentence about what the deck does differently. And no deck fixes a reader who still asks intrusive questions. A reader with a standard deck and good habits will serve an LGBTQ+ client better than a reader with an inclusive deck and poor ones.
Questions a reader should and should not ask
- “What would you like me to call you?” Name and pronouns, asked once, in the same tone as asking what question they brought.
- “Is there anything about how I frame this reading that would make it more useful?” This lets a client say “please do not assume my partner is a man” without having to raise it unprompted.
- “What is the question we are actually working on?” The best readings start with a clear question that the client owns.
- “Is it all right if I refer to your partner as they?” Only if the client has mentioned a partner; otherwise there is no partner to refer to.
- “Would you like to stop here?” Asked when a card lands heavily or a topic turns out to be bigger than a reading.
- Anything about transition, surgery, bodies or “what you were born as”. It is not relevant to any card and it is not the reader’s business.
- Whether the client is out, or to whom. If the client wants the reader to know, they will say so.
- “Which of you is the man in the relationship?” or any question that forces a same-sex couple into a different template.
- Questions about sexual history. No spread needs them.
- “Have you considered that this is a phase?” No reading can diagnose, change or confirm who someone is, and a reader who suggests otherwise should be left.
Safety and privacy
Privacy is a practical concern for every client, and a more serious one for LGBTQ+ clients. A client may be out to friends but not to family, out at work but not at home, or living somewhere where being visible carries real risk. A reading is a private conversation and should stay one.
In person, that means a room where the conversation cannot be overheard, and no commentary afterwards in a shop’s shared space. Online, it means not recording video sessions without clear consent, not keeping chat transcripts longer than needed, and never posting screenshots, testimonials or “client stories” that could identify someone, even with the name removed. Details such as a city, a job and a relationship shape can identify a person quickly in a small community. If a client asks what the reader keeps, the honest answer should be short.
Some readings surface situations that need more than cards. If a client describes fear, control or threats in a relationship, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788), and in immediate danger the number is 911. If a client is in low mood or talks about harming themselves, the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline can be reached by calling or texting 988 in the US, and LGBTQ+ young people can also contact The Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386 or by texting START to 678-678. A reader does not need to be a counsellor to know these numbers and to say them calmly.
A short pre-reading checklist
- Set the frame. One sentence: “The cards offer prompts for reflection; they do not predict or judge.”
- Ask name and pronouns. Then use them, including for the figures on the cards when they seem to point to the client.
- Agree the question. Shape it as something the client can act on.
- Read ranks and situations, not genders. If a court card appears, describe an approach.
- Check in before the end. “Is there a card you want to go back to?” gives the client control of the last word.
Key takeaways
- The gendered court cards are a leftover of 15th-century card games and 19th-century occult conventions; the ranks carry the meaning, not the costumes.
- Read Pages, Knights, Queens and Kings as approaches to a suit’s territory, and couple cards as choices, partnerships and belonging of any shape.
- Inclusive decks are a helpful genre, but a reader’s questions and habits matter more than the pictures.
- Ask name, pronouns and the real question; never ask about bodies, transition, outness or sexual history.
- Protect privacy in person and online, and keep crisis numbers ready in case a reading needs them.
Related reading
- Reading the Tarot Court Cards
- Love Tarot Readings
- 5 Tips for a Great Tarot Card Reading
- How to Pick the Right Tarot Deck
- What Does the Queen of Swords Tarot Card Mean?
- Questions Not to Ask the Tarot
Frequently asked questions
1. Do I need a special deck to read for LGBTQ+ clients?
No. A standard Rider-Waite-Smith deck works if the reader treats the figures as roles and moods rather than as statements about the client. Inclusive decks are a helpful option, not a requirement.
2. What does it mean when a Queen comes up for a man, or a King for a woman?
It means the client, or someone around them, is approaching a situation with that rank’s style: Queens hold and understand from the inside, Kings direct and decide. The figure’s gender is a convention of the rank and says nothing about the client.
3. How do I read the Lovers for a same-sex couple?
The same way as for any couple: as a card about choice, values and union. The man and woman in the 1909 picture are the artist’s convention, not a condition of the meaning.
4. Should I use they/them for every court card?
It is a simple habit that avoids assuming anything, and many readers use it. If the client has told you who a card refers to, use that person’s pronouns.
5. Is it rude to ask a client’s pronouns?
No. Asked once, in a neutral tone, alongside the other opening questions, it is a courtesy. Pressing for an explanation afterwards is what makes it uncomfortable.
6. Can tarot tell someone whether they are gay, bisexual or trans?
No. Tarot cannot diagnose, confirm or change anyone’s orientation or gender identity. A reader who claims it can is making things up.
7. What are inclusive tarot decks?
A genre of modern decks that redraw the people on the cards with varied bodies, ages, skin tones and couples, or rename the court cards with gender-free titles. They follow the same structure of 78 cards and usually the same meanings.
8. What should I say if my deck is not inclusive?
One sentence is enough: “This deck is from 1909, so the pictures are old-fashioned; I read the figures as roles, not as people.” Then move on.
9. What questions should a reader avoid?
Anything about bodies, transition, surgery, outness or sexual history, and any question that forces a relationship into a man-and-woman template. None of it is relevant to a spread.
10. How do I read the Ten of Cups for someone without a traditional family?
As belonging, home and emotional security as the client defines them. Chosen family, close friends or a stable solo life are all Ten of Cups readings.
11. Can a reading confirm whether my partner is cheating?
No. No spread can read another person’s mind or confirm infidelity, whatever the relationship. Cards like the Three of Swords are prompts about hurt and honesty, not evidence.
12. What privacy steps matter most for LGBTQ+ clients?
A room that cannot be overheard, no recording without consent, no stored transcripts beyond what is needed, and never sharing stories or screenshots that could identify a client, even anonymised.
13. What if a client discloses fear or threats at home during a reading?
Stop reading and give the number: the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788); in immediate danger call 911. A reader does not have to solve the situation, only to point to the right help.
14. Where can an LGBTQ+ young person get crisis support?
In the US, call or text 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, or contact The Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386 or by texting START to 678-678.
15. Do the Thoth or Marseille decks have the same gendered court cards?
The Marseille pattern uses King, Queen, Knight and Page; the Thoth deck uses Knight, Queen, Prince and Princess. In every case the rank carries the meaning and the gender is a convention.
16. What is the single most useful habit for inclusive readings?
Describe approaches and situations instead of people: “someone leading with warmth” rather than “a woman”. It works for every card and every client.
Evidence note: Card meanings here follow Rider-Waite-Smith (1909) conventions and the Golden Dawn correspondences that deck drew on; they are interpretive traditions, not findings about people. Tarot began as a card game in 1430s Italy according to Britannica, and no reading has been shown to predict events, read minds, or determine anyone’s identity. If a reading involves fear, control or threats in a relationship, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788); in immediate danger call 911. For low mood or thoughts of self-harm, call or text 988 in the US; LGBTQ+ young people can also reach The Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386.
“Gender is a spectrum”—what a novel idea! 🙄 The tarot world has its traditions for a reason. You can’t just change everything because it doesn’t fit modern ideals; that’s not how history works.
‘History’ doesn’t justify exclusion, Gizmo! If we’re going to evolve as practitioners, we must challenge old norms and adapt to new understandings of identity.
Why bother changing how we read? Tarot has been doing fine without catering to every single identity out there. It’s not like everyone needs their own custom deck with their favorite colors and styles or anything… 😂
I absolutely loved this article! It highlights the importance of inclusivity in tarot readings, especially for LGBTQ+ clients. Approaching each reading with respect and empathy really resonates with me. Thank you for sharing such valuable insights! 🌈
I appreciate this approach—it’s about time we make spiritual practices accessible and relatable to all identities! Inclusivity in tarot isn’t just good practice; it’s essential if we want everyone to feel represented.
“Use gender-neutral language”—this is golden advice! It’s such an easy change to make that can have huge impacts on how safe clients feel during their readings. Time to update our vocabulary, folks!
This post is really insightful! It’s refreshing to see a discussion about how traditional tarot decks can be limiting for LGBTQ+ clients. Adapting our interpretations can truly enhance the reading experience for everyone! 🌟
‘Adjusting your lens’ sounds great and all, but at the end of the day, a card still shows what it shows. Can you really redefine something that has been around forever? Seems a bit unrealistic!
I totally agree with Baby! It’s high time that we break down these outdated views in tarot. This shift is essential if we want to make our practices more relevant and inclusive!
While I appreciate the intention behind this article, I find it somewhat superficial. Just saying we need to be inclusive isn’t enough; the underlying issues in tarot practices need to be addressed more deeply.
‘King of Swords’ means clarity? More like ‘King of Confusion’ when you pull it for someone who doesn’t identify that way! 😅 Let’s just admit some cards need rebranding or new meanings!